And yet, as the calendar turned and that day drew closer, we saw her do nothing to sign up for Driver’s ed. She made no effort to even get her learner’s permit.
I imagine a lot of factors contributed to her not living up to her statement. We were those parents who made it clear that a gift of a car would not wait until their 16th birthday or later. It’s something our kids need to figure out how to buy into and support on their own.
Growing up in the city, Uber or public transportation took her where she needed to go. She went to college in a town where you don’t need a car.
But the college years are over. His daughter is trying to break into the competitive film production industry. No matter the potential opportunity, it’s clear: the girl must be able to drive. She needs a car.
Sounds simple enough, except she’s back in our townhouse as we’re 250 miles away in the remote coastal swamp.
Have you ever thought about how to get your license if you don’t have a car?
Like many of her other recent challenges, Daughter broke the problem down into smaller pieces. She works double shifts at a local restaurant to pay for driving lessons with a company that will also take her to the driving test.
First, she needed her learner’s permit.
She left last week, 6 and a half years after she could have had it for the first time. She failed with a missed question.
I happened to be in town the next day, so I told her I would take her so she could try again. I waited in the parking lot. “That should take about half an hour,” she said as she got out of my car.
Ten minutes later, she came out sulking. “Oh dear!” I thought. “That’s not how I saw this one unfold.”
I learned that this is the general theme of parenthood. At least the kinder, gray-hair-minimizing approach. They each have their own speed. Most find their way, even at their own pace.
Did you find that too, dear reader? Ditch the chronological comparison and things will be much better for everyone.
Sulking Daughter walked around to the passenger side, opened the door, and grinned. “Someone has their learner’s permit!” she sang and danced.
I think I was even more excited than I would have been if she was 15.
She is 22 years old and on her way.
Driving lessons start next week.
Won’t it be interesting to see how long that takes?
Daryn Kagan is the author of the book “Hope Is Possible: A Network Presenter’s Reflections on Losing Her Job, Finding Love, a New Career, and My Dog, Always My Dog.” Email him at [email protected].